JamesRobot

For all of the entertainment Trump has given to the world in the last 4 years, it better end in a glorious fit of sour grapes. I'd be disappointed with anything less.

I am of the mind, that if another adult needs to tell my kid what to do, the kid was probably being a nuisance. It def happens from time to time. My reaction is to apologize to the adult and ask the boy why he was being talked to. It's usually something stupid and he didn't realize he was being annoying. Kids live to test boundaries, especially if they feel they are distanced from their parents influence. I actually feel more comfortable in those situations than if a rando just strikes up a conversation with a little kid. That's where one really needs to be on point. It's usually just an elderly person who loves kids. But the creep factor is def turned up. As long as they are polite and keep their distance I'll allow it with keen attention.

To a degree. While I should've disengaged, I also didn't go out of my way. From my perspective, the fight came to me. Sure I have some entitlement regarding my children. Who doesn't? And I don't even really care that mom showed up with no mask. It's a very large park with plenty of open space and she intentionally kept her distance. However, I did use that as a point to antagonize because I felt attacked. I was pretty calm at this point. Certainly not barking orders. Though I should have chosen my words better. I really should have said that he can't play with us. Her boy was ultimately looking for that approval from me.

I'd say she's textbook by Wikipedia's definition. I'd also add that there's a little more derogatory connotation that wiki leaves out. Really I'm just using the term to illustrate and add a little flavor. But according to the terms: Entitlement - She felt she shouldn't need to wear a mask in public despite local law and that her child can play with whomever despite the fact that the other party expressly does not want to. Selfish - No regard for others. Again by not wearing a legally mandated mask in public (really for the protection of others) and that she can't respect me enough to leave me alone. Desire to complain - She immediately started shouting me down across the park. Not initially of course, but because of the perceived slight directed at her child. Willing to risk or demean others to achieve her ends - Shouting at a total stranger in a park is demeaning and clearly risky for her own wellbeing as well as her child's. I actually don't feel as though pandemic has taxed me too greatly. Yeah it's certainly annoying but if anything, everyone should be held to a higher standard of respect because of it including myself. I agree. Best of luck with your therapy, Fenrir.

Not denying that. And maybe I wasn't clear in the first post but she was yelling at me from word go. Likely due to her own interpretation of what her boy told her which I didn't really hear but I think it was as simple as, "he told me I have to wear a mask." I don't feel you need to defend your position further and I fully expected to hear this point of view when I posted. And I respect it. Others can choose to hear it or not. I also think if we had a better balance of gender here, we would have more people of the same opinion. I think it's been a good discussion overall. And while much of my defense of my own position is playing devil's advocate, I still maintain that I didn't instigate. That is not to say that I wouldn't apologize to that poor lady or that I'm off the hook in anyway. But I think it's a good setting for discussing social boundaries.

Lol

No. SHE started it! Seriously, it is not my position that I'm a bully or even an instigator here. Her first reaction was to yell across the park and my initial response was calm and civil. She clearly didn't want to hear me and continued to yell, so it escalated. Once that happens, civility is out the window whether I engage or not. I also think people take way too much offense to catching a finger. It's a PG-13 gesture at best. She completely lost her shit. If I was a bully, I would have started calling names and threatening her. Neither of which occurred. I disagree. If someone wants to be left alone. Leave em alone. My kids have run into other kids at the park who are antisocial and they just leave them alone. Go do something else. I agree. As soon as she gave me the business, I should've just made my Sega reference and dipped.

Correct. I didn't even tell the kid that he couldn't use the swings. He wasn't even interested in the swings. He was specifically interested in me. Most likely as a prelude to playing with my kids. Which, as I mentioned, was not bound to happen.

Went to watch Predator a couple weeks ago and realized I didn't have it in my collection. Guess I can't give it the 10 it deserves. But it's killer in every way. GET TO DA CHOPPA!!

It's a toss up among SMB 1-3 and Mega Man 2. I've beat each countless times.

Constitution of United States of America 1789 (rev. 1992) Amendment I Congress shall make no law... abridging the freedom of speech... Also harassment is unwanted conduct based on specific protected classes. Race, gender, disability, etc. What if the conduct is unwanted but unrelated to protected status? You would rather tuck tail and run than let the offender know that the action is unwanted? These type of interactions inform people about how they should behave according to the social norms. It can be as simple as: You: Please leave me alone. Me: Oh sorry. I didn't realize I was bothering you. See you later. Irregardless, one should respect other's peaceful existence in public even though there is no express law that forbids them from being a jerk. It is not a matter of law, rather a matter of respect dictated by western societal mores.

I got you!! https://www.ebay.com/itm/Mike-Tysons-Punch-Out-Nintendo-NES-Cartridge-And-Sleeve-Tested-Working/353333410395?epid=56209434&hash=item52444ffa5b:g:W0AAAOSwAp1f6Nr-

My uncle works for Nintendo!

That isn't the question. Someone you don't like is invading your personal space in a public setting and annoying the piss out of you without physical contact. It is their legal right to do so. You gonna back down or you gonna tell them off? Both actions are legal. It's not a matter of entitlement.

You have every right to tell someone to leave you alone in public.

What would you do? A known bad influence is harassing your kid in a public space but no physical contact so everything is nice and legal. Do you just tolerate it and run away? Or are you going to stick up for your kid and tell the bad influence to kick rocks.

For sure kids are gross. I do what I can to mitigate risk but also not live in fear. Masks in public (by order of law), hand sanitize after play, wash hands when we get home. Let's put COVID and mask politics aside. You're telling me that you would bite your tongue and let anyone stand within an inch of you without actual physical contact and let them ruin your day. You would just take shit, stand down, and walk away? You wouldn't let them know that what they are doing is not ok?

So legally, up until the point of unwanted physical contact, there is no issue. Fine. Then there is also no issue with me telling the kid to take a hike. I didn't tell him that he couldn't use the park equipment, I told him he couldn't play with my kids. Tough luck little dude. COVID aside, what if I just don't like the kid and tell him to get lost? Also not illegal and also not an issue of entitlement. Had she told me to piss off? I don't really know in the heat of the moment. Probably would have said something else offensive honestly.

Whew. There's a lot to unpack here. First, so I am clear, the incident started off polite enough. The kid didn't just roll up and hop on the swings next to us, he specifically came up to me (3 feet) with a yearning to play with somebody. After he said he had no mask, I told him he can't play with us. Like I said, it's a big park, let his mom play with him. Even in non-COVID times, if I tell a kid (or anyone) to scram, he should respect that and beat it. And his mom should know damn well not to poke a bear who wants to be left alone. If I had a less pleasant demeanor, would she have felt comfortable striking up an argument? I doubt it. Now, I aired my dirty laundry and asked for everyone's opinion so I appreciate all of your responses so far. I even respect the sole member that had the balls to tell me that I'm the asshole here. Looking at you @Quest4Nes. But I've got a couple arguments to make. 1. None taken. Is it embarrassing? Probably to some; I don't give a shit. I'm not the Karen here. There shouldn't have been an argument in the first place. I let mom know that her kid can't play with us without a mask. I only engaged after Karen couldn't leave well enough alone and kept running her mouth. 2. Fine, the kids can play if they respect each other. No mask? Get the fuck away from me. So I'm just supposed to live in fear and remain a hermit while the mouth breathers run rampant with no concern for responsibility or consequences? I don't operate that way. My advice to her or anyone is, don't start none, won't be none. ----------------------- I can hear all of that, Boosted. And while I feel justified to a degree, I still wish I could have been a little less self-righteous. I go to that specific park because there is plenty of room and I can give the anti-maskers a wide berth and still enjoy the space. When this all went down, we were the only people at the park. It is a civil issue and I have no qualms letting people know they're out of line. 1. As I mentioned at the top of this post. The kid didn't roll up and hop on the swings. Of course, I don't own the park. But where does my right for personal space begin and end? Social mores dictate 6 feet in today's current climate. I have every legal/social right to tell the kid to take a hike. 2. She doesn't know me from Adam. She elicited that response. Was it appropriate? Of course not. But neither is starting an argument with a stranger who politely asked to be left alone. Once she crossed the line, appropriateness is out the window. I may be teaching my kids socially unacceptable ways to respond in public, but she is teaching her kid a far more dangerous game that it's ok to confront people who expressly want nothing to do with you. Stranger danger should have been her first lesson to her kid. 3. I do feel bad about it. I'm never out to ruin anyone's day. Like I said, I didn't want the argument in the first place but I am also not about to kowtow to someone who can't respect others and just stop what I am doing. 4. I did ask the kid if he had a mask. She was offended that I didn't want him near me without one. I got nothing against the kid. She made it personal on her end. Thanks for your perspective and honesty, Boost. One more question for you, at what point should personal space be respected ---------------------- Godspeed, Strangest. Get well soon. ------------------------ Agreed. ------------------------- I hear you but I can't just lay down or be run off just because someone else offended. There have been times at the same park where we show up and there are just too many families without masks. I will just leave in those instances. In this case we were there first and our personal space was being encroached. Please leave us alone. No? Fuck off then. --------------------------- I have every legal right to ask someone who is bothering me to leave me alone. Sure the kid was sad, but he did leave us alone. Sorry kid, bring a mask next time. Mom also has every legal right to be offended. And start an argument. I probably could have just ignored her and maybe she would have went away. That would have been the high road in my opinion. Meh. While I wish I could have been a more mature about the whole thing, I am not ashamed. What should one expect when you start shouting across a public space at someone? Civil dissertation on the pros and cons wearing masks in public during a global pandemic? Anyway, its not my hang-up. We all act contrary to our best character at sometime or another. I'm man enough to admit I came up short and I apologized to both of my kids individually. Ain't no shame in that. If I should feel shame, so should the other parent for instigating the situation. If she's a good mom (I will give her the benefit of the doubt) she will have apologized to her kid for her own hand in this too.

That's exactly how it happened. Bow tie and all.

I actually did apologize to my kids. They seemed a little upset after we left so I asked my boy if I was out of line and he said yes. I'm pretty hotheaded and try to keep it in check. Learn to drive! Seriously though, I gave her the finger because I didn't want to hear her bullshit in the first place. She ended up getting both barrels because she couldn't shut her fat mouth.